THE UGLY

Hmm... oba you left them where??

A young lady walked into our office today. She is modestly gifted by nature. After she has done her bidding, she is leaving, and one of my colleagues asks her, ‘why did you leave your behinds at home’ it’s that question that got my attention so I look in the direction of this mooting conversation.

‘What?’ she asks looking confused.

‘Your bums, you came without them’ he said with an evil smile on his face.

bwahahahahahahhaha

 I died! (By that I mean laughter got me off my chair to the floor, as I gasped, tossed, jerked all in uncontrolled laughter.) You know it seemed like her but was wearable and she had deliberately taken it off for the day, remaining with nothing but a deeply amusing flatness at her back.

Interestingly, the girl laughed too as she walked out saying, ‘nice one… I will get you too later.’

I am wondering why guys are obsessed with backyards. I swear I never used to notice until this day. (Dan don’t give me that look, I am serious). I used to have unbiased hunting escapades. Anyway, we are heading off to the field to do some work, we sit in a taxi, and just across the road, and there is this overly endowed lady. She is like a self-contained RV, a two in one. I look at my colleague, and I am like ‘boss, I think you would prefer that one, (pointing in her direction), anti you said the other one had left her bums at home.’

You all know it is fasting time all over, and so, Muslims do not eat the whole day, but have quite a meal, or should we say meals when they break their fast in the evening.

‘ayaa, ooyoo anyuma, kusibulukukiira kko’

 So, he looks in the direction of this pumped lady, and almost suddenly exclaims, ‘ayaa, ooyoo anyuma, kusibulukukiira kko’ loosely translated, ‘ayaa, that would be a good one to break your fast on.’ Everyone in the taxi heard, and tacitly turned to look in the direction of the lady. The laughter was momentous. Through our journey people laughed.

In my little head I was confused. Was he for or against backyards, or was he just presented with both extremes today? The extra not there (small) and the extra there (endowed)?  If you ask my opinion, maybe the extra there would be better. I mean I would rather be suffocated than be with one who looks like a twelve year old boy…. Just saying.

 

Disclaimer: this is all fiction, no bearing to anything or anyone, but done for you to take a moment and laugh or be angry or judge me, or just shake your head… yes you… what are you thinking??